Tale of a Game Magus

      What is possibly the most important in having a happy and fulfilling life is finding balance. Balance in emotions can keep you level headed. A work-life balance makes one feel fulfilled but not overworked. Moderation in something like eating can make one healthier. There's a level of balance in all things and creating and maintaining that balance is incredibly difficult and sometimes near impossible for me. Making sense that October's card for me is the Two of Pentacles.     Here in this deck's Two of Pentacles, a lady rides a penny-farthing bicycle over unstable waters. Those bikes are hard to keep upright as it is. We must note that the bike chain is the infinity symbol or figure 8. In tarot, this is usually seen in Major Arcana such as Strength and The Magician. It represents infinite, as in the infinite need to keep balance despite how rough the waters may be, but also shows the connection between things. The book that came with this dec...

      Aha! I fooled you all. You thought I was gonna do my overall favorites list, but I have here another list but based around music. I may not have mentioned it much in my blog or on any videos or streams, but music is actually a big part of my life. I know how to play Trombone, Guitar and Bass and kinda know piano. I don't play as much as I would like. I feel my setup here isn't the best and I get anxious when random people hear me practice. In a condo environment, that's almost inevitable.      Regardless, I've always been fascinated by video game music. Their whole point is to portray an emotion to help amplify what an environment or event wants to make the player feel. Weather it's a boss fight, a silly moment or an ambient room. Many songs stick to me and keep coming up during certain moments in my life. Like Animal Crossing's Forest Life when I'm calm and Sonic Adventure 2's Green Forest song when I'm running late for something.   ...

                                                When one sees the card Death, they often assume it's a negative card. One that is a harbinger of death itself. However, it actually means change. This change can come in multiple forms from taking on a new job, changing your lifestyle, moving, or even, yes, death. It's a card that stands for endings and beginnings or, more accurately, rebirth.      This is a card that would also have made sense for last month for actual death did occur in my life, which caused a bit of a spiral for me and did change a lot of how I go about my day to day. I think I'm through the worst of the mourning process, however I tear up a bit, even as I write this. It did kinda stop me from wanting to do anything, which is why it took me so long to post this and work on my other projects. I was hoping to have my animation th...

      Preparing to go on vacation next week, my brother needed someone to take care of his cat. It was decided his cat would be left at my mothers and a family friend would take care of him. It was then decided that my cat would, too, do the same. On Saturday, I handed over my cat to my mother who stopped by. I needed to trick her into her carrier (as per usual) and, upon placing her in the car, I felt a sense of dread. I felt it would be the last time I would see her. I brushed it off as paranoia because I often worried about her.      Wednesday was a long day at work. 10 hours with children is exhausting. During that time, my mother asked when I was out of work, not following up as to why. I got home a little after 6:00, took a hit and a shower, anticipating my fiancé's mother and sister coming over as they do most Wednesdays. When I left the shower, I saw my fiancé on our bed with a facial expression that seemed like a mix between sad and ...

      A very strange card that has two potential meanings. Either it tells me to save money or to spend it. With how my life is now, I hardly know which.      People will always say that it is better to save money, but what's the point of savings if you never spend it? I've always been a tad stingy with my money; always fearing that I would run out. While in college I didn't have a source of income. In AmeriCorps I was paid about $3 an hour and was on food stamps. Since then, I've only had seasonal positions that paid a little above state minimum. I've never felt financially stable, however my savings weren't bad all things considered. I wouldn't spend my money on many things compared to someone like my brother or fiancé; opting to really plan out and save for any purchases outside of the necessities. My computer was a huge purchase for me that I had planned for years before I actually put in the order. Living away from my parent umbrella gives its own set ...

           For obvious reasons, gameplay is important to a game. But that seems to go over people's heads. Some games just feel clunky. Little to no love went into it, hoping to get by on interesting concepts alone. Yooka Laylee and Mighty #9 are perfect examples. They tried to ride the coat tails of their predecessors of Banjo-Kazooie and Mega Man. Even having the original creators and, in the case of Yooka Laylee, the original composer. But both games felt half-assed. They were glitchy and felt like fan games of the predecessors.      Some games seem great in retrospect, but when re-visited, don't stand the test of time. Often times people see a childhood game through rose colored glasses and can't see what's wrong with it. I've been recommended Shadow of the Colossus since it came out. When I finally played it, I was incredibly disappointed. The controls were some of the most frustrating I've ever used. Clunky and just awkward. B...

      First off, I want to preface this by saying I forgot to do last month's card of the Three of Cups. This card stood for celebration and friendship. It was, however upside down and while I don't always read reverse, this one seemed to fit with what actually happened. The reverse meaning either solemness or loneliness. While busy, the month felt relatively jovial. There was a week where my fiancé left on a trip and I took that time to really just kinda meditate and think about myself.      In the Three of Wands, a man stands on a hill overlooking a harbor. He has a tripod type of setup with a spyglass looking out towards the horizon. The card stands for careful planning and slow execution. A planning stage per-say for what is to come.      As always, I have more ideas than drive, however, this time, I feel more a push for productivity. It helps that my therapist began to give me the task of doing at least 3 hours working on ...